The 90/10 Principle in 2010

In many ways I am a creature fueled by fear, anxiety and low self-esteem.  I gauge my own personal growth upon the "feel-good" measures that I have culminated for the day - only to find that there are far more triggers in my reactionary phase which I didn't give honorary credit to.

The 90/10 Principle basically states that life is made up of 10% of what happens to you and 90% - your reaction to that 10%.  In measurement of reaction to circumstanes beyond my control, I have failed.  I have aligned my fear with the tally sheets that adorn my notebook for what I think should happen; consistently keeping track of the efforts toward self-improvement, and I recently slung a good line of BS at the person who is my hero because of it.  The man who has, for four years been my daily breath of sanity, thick and thin, hot and cold, good and bad, he is there for me.  Though as any wandering soul can relate, being bombarded with a constant barrage of "did me wrongs" gets old well before it becomes compelling.

Consequently, does one know what one does when one is called out on one's shit? I will tell you...

One that is fear-driven, denies the magnitude of one's shit.

After 4-1/2 hours of discerning this enlightened view point, I feel it fair to say that I have been a slow-learner in the category of what constitutes acceptance of mistakes.

I made a mistake.  I played a tugging battle between the highs and lows which has kept this man chasing boomerangs for far too long!  And at this point, the cryptic messages that actions were sending (even though cryptic) ...have served to adorn, or really cloud the intention.

Buggers!!

In the meantime, and with 90/10 in-tote, I'm putting out there that my Hero deserves a medal. For contending with this, with me...thank you Love.